It's not all about me. It's OK.

Recently, I had a conversation with one of my mentors, Dr. Mark Lyman Taylor. Just for the record, he is so awesome! Him and his wife make a great team, especially when it comes to sorting out my problems (which, often times, are quite a few!). I also like their dog Jazzmyn, but I especially like it when Mrs. T. buys me M&Ms or makes M&M cookies. But, alas, I digress...

The conversation entailed a discussion about relationships. With the move to VT coming up, I have been feeling a lot like many of my relationships will suffer. Some of my relationships won't I know, because of how they have been in the past. For instance, family ties will never end--Mom, Dad, Johanna, Gracie, Grandma, Aunt Sharon, etc... will always be there for me--ALWAYS! Then there are certain friends, like my roommate Amanda and my wonderful friend Christa who will always be there for me. I could go on and on, but just to name a few lasting relationships--Jenn, Heidi & Brandon, Telli, Dr. and Mrs. T. (of course) and I am sure that there are many other ones. I am not saying that other people aren't my friends now, but you know how it goes, certain ones don't last.

BUT... there are certain ones that I really want to work. And it seems that the ones that I most want to work, don't. I am a very relationship oriented person. In other words, I HATE when relationships suffer. Distance is one of the factors in my recently fractured friendships. For example, Hungary is one place where I made many close friendships and obviously they don't work out. I know the people there don't hate me or anything, but I think it stinks that I don't talk to them as often.

There are also many people in Grand Rapids that I am going to miss terribly. Certain professors/mentors/friends I am going to miss terribly! I seemed to gain a certain flow there; my friends and I just got each other. Sadly, we had similar humor. Well, to us it wasn't sad... it was actually quite entertaining. But, to others--those who didn't know us--it would definately be considered pathetic. Ah well...

And then I have friends in Onsted... (Sarah K., you could be in two categories--Onsted or GR, but I prefer to think of you in the GR category, because right now I am definately feeling closer to my GR relationships... no offense to those of you in Onsted!!). It's these relationships that I worry about the most: 1) At some level, I feel like I have no more common points of interest, 2) I definately feel like I don't have enough energy to keep in contact with people in two different places, plus gain new friendships in VT, 3) At some level, I have to ask myself, "What is the point?" To state this in the words of one of my fav movies, Pirates of the Caribbean, "To what point and purpose, matey?" For most of my relationships in O-Town, I can definately NOT say, "I would die for them." I know that that statement probably sounds quite morbid, but I think that is the type of friend I am. If I don't feel like my relationships go all the way, then I feel like there really isn't a point to them. I know that is very selfish; I have had this conversation with more than one person. But, how can I ditch a personality trait that I have always had? And, personally, I don't think that it is a BAD personality trait. It isn't a trait that could be considered morally or ethically *wrong*. Perhaps, people could disagree with it, and that, of course, is fine...

What am I trying to say? I guess, just what I said to Dr. T.: I don't have the energy to keep up both ends of a relationship. That, too, is not wrong. It just is.

My problem is going to be constantly wondering if the people whom I have "ended" (by end, I don't mean I will completely ignore them) a relationship with HATE me... I think that is just something I am going to have to wrestle with on my own terms. As Chuck would say, "Sarah, it's not all about you."

So, to close this depressing blog...

It isn't ALL about me.

It's okay.

Sarah Says "No" to Stephen!!!

This is an official blog about my lovely friend Steven Culp. Actually, we are not really friends--we are more like acquaintences. In fact, to be totally honest, we have never met. But, all of that is besides the point. Read on!

My friend, Steven, who will be hence forth known as Steven is no longer going to be acting on JAG. At least, that is what the powers that be have led us to believe. Apparently, he died by falling off of some ship in the middle of some ocean (note to all you JAG fanatics: I watched the season finale by phone due to the fact that we had a tornado watch/warning, so I admit that I am sketchy on some of the details). Now, I really don't have a problem with this because, in JAG-speak, I am a total shipper. For those of you who don't watch JAG, that simply means that Harm and Mac need to be together; it's something akin to being a trekky. Anyway, other than Steven being a great asset to the show, I won't miss him too much on the show.

It is the show that he is GOING to be on that I have a problem with. Desperate Housewives? Are you serious??? And they are advertising it as a prime time soap! Seriously, Steven, you have done so much better. In the past, he as acted on The Emperor's Club and Thirteen Days just to name a few. And now he is going to be on a prime time soap! I seriously think that he was smoking some thing!

On that note, I have decided that I am going to join a medieval Latin monastary until Steven can figure out that he is a much better actor than this.

Again, thank you for listening to my incessent rambling about the important things in life.

Fin.

P.S. I LOVE YOU, CHRISTA WELTY!!!

P.P.S Are we happy that I have spelled Christa correctly, Jessica? *Wink Wink* I love you, too! Hope everything is going well for you!

Birthdays and Hospital Visits

Hey ya'll...

I guess it has been quite a while since I have posted, eh? Well... a lot has happened since then!

First, I celebrated my 22nd birthday on August 10th. I feel so old! Well, maybe not "old" per say, but definately "matured"... but, not in the sense that one would normally used the word matured! I told my mom to center my birthday around a JAG related theme (duh), and she did a wonderful job! Just to give you an example, my birthday cake read "I hope you always stay out of HARM's way!" Isn't that creative?

Also, the 'rents got a new stove and a new mattress. I slept through the whole ordeal, however, because the night before I stayed up all night at our local Relay for Life. The high schoolers managed to stay all day on Saturday, but I had to go home in the am and go to sleep. Ahh... the days when I could pull all nighters just for the heck of it! Relay for Life really is a good cause, though. I have been told that our county is about third in the nation for raising money and community turn-out. Isn't that awesome!?! I did it with my church this year; we just had so much fun hanging out!

I found my soul-mate. Now, let me explain, before you all start flipping out and calling congress. For graduation I was supposed to get a camera. Well, it has been three months and 6 days since graduation and, you guessed it, still no camera. The other day I went into Image Gallery (a store in our town that half of my church members own/work at) and I found my camera. My friend, Brad, tipped me off to it being there. When I went in I wasn't that excited... and then I saw it (drum roll please)--I completely fell IN LOVE! Yet... still no camera... hmm...

To top off all of the excitement of the past few weeks--I went to the hospital last night. I thought I was dying. But, I remember thinking 'No, if I was dying my life would have flashed before my eyes. Hey, Nonny Nonny.' Okay, maybe I didn't think the 'Hey, Nonny Nonny' part, but I did think the other stuff. What was actually happening, occured due to an old shoulder injury. My shoulder had been hurting more than it usually does the past few days and, for some reason, it started spasming uncontrollably. It was really scary! Of course, I started hyperventillating, so that didn't help at all. But the paramedics and the rescue squad were totally awesome with everything!!! They were the best! If I was the President of the US of A, I would offer to give them purple hearts. I am not sure if you can give paramedics purple hearts... maybe I would give them orange hearts.

Well, that just about covers it. Hope you all have a GRRRRRREAAAAAAAAT (as my good friend, Tony, would say) weekend!

P.S. Don't forget to go to church in the morning!

If it says "quiescently" it should definately NOT be in the icecream section!

Yo Diggity Ya'll!!!

What is up? I am just hanging out in good ol' GR. I went to my friend, Heidi's wedding this weekend. It was beautiful! I am so happy for her! Brandon is going to be a wonderful husband who will take care of her and support her for the rest of her life. They were definately meant for each other!

Right now I am typing on my friend's computer. This would be an okay thing... except for the minor detail the "e" key has issues and someone rearranged all of her letters on the keyboard. Thankfully, I can type (for the most part) without looking at the keys. Sometimes I have to glance down, and then that throws me off. I guess that kind of enforces the phrase "keep your chin up," eh?

We went to Meijer this evening. While in the icecream section, my roomie was drooling over the popsicles. Innocently, I perused the isle with her, when suddenly... unexpectedly... I saw something that one should NEVER be subject to see in an icecream section. That's right... one of the boxes said the word "quiescently." Now, while I am usually not one to complain, at least about the general appearance of my popsicle boxes, this untimely event disturbed me. When an individual has to use more than one syllable to describe his popsicles, it probably isn't worth buying. Feel free to continue purchasing your multisyllabic popsicle boxes. Personally, I am going to be looking for the Chilly Willy penguin. I refuse to subject myself to such vulgar language!

The following is inspired by a recent conversation: I saw King Arthur not too long ago. It was a good movie. EXCEPT FOR ONE MINOR DETAIL... In the movie, King Arthur was presented as Palagean. Unless I am totally off on this one, the idea of Palageanism was that one could get to heaven by being good or proving oneself... (something akin to Catholicism, not to be confused with small "c" catholicism--Mel, I had to add this one in!). So the whole SEX SCENE pretty much ruined that! If any of my Palagean friends can help me out on this one... that would be much appreciated.

Finally, I have a confession to make. I missed JAG this Friday. I know it was a rerun... but just the idea of it is making me convulse. I will have to perform some type of penance. Donald would not be very happy with me. As his future employer, I really need to improve my work ethic.

Enough rambling for the day. I have offended enough people for one day.

Melissa is HOT and TEMPTING

This post is lovingly dedicated to my friend Melissa. This weekend I am hanging out with her and, sadly, my previously disposed of theology teacher and his wife (no, I have not killed him... he is just no longer my professor). I have a wedding to go to this weekend so I am up in GR and I will get to see all of my friends the last time before I leave for VERMONT!!! Yika!

Yesterday I babysat for my little cousins, Abby and Emmy. They are adorable! However... I learned somethings while I was enduring, I mean enjoying, the 7+ hours I spent with them. First, the value of pull-ups during nap time is highly underappreciated! Especially, when one puts the kid down for a nap ON TOP of the covers of a king sized bed. Yes, please award me the "duh" award. Secondly, Mac and Cheese and hotdogs... er... nevermind I am not even going to go there.

Seeing as how I am going to be away for the next couple of days, I won't be posting. Please don't throw too many parties while I am away. I know, you are all probably thrilled that I will be shut up for a while... ah well. Anyway, I have decided to leave you with an heirloom. If I die, you can have this and you can never say that I never gave you anything. My friend, Melissa's, live journal:

www.livejournal.com/users/melly_missa

Why are RED, WHITE, and BLUE considered patriotic?

Today is PRIMARY ELECTION DAY! Thus, I have decided to type in a patriotic color: red. Unless you are color blind, and then the color might appear to be green.

So, the question of the day: who decided that red, white, and blue was patriotic to begin with? Hmm... Someday I want to decide something. Or make up a word. Something little... but annoying enough that people will remember me as the person who invented that particular product. For example, sticky notes. The individual who created them was a genius! And yet, you never hear anything on Entertainment Tonight about what the creater of sticky notes had for dinner. We always hear about Tom Cruise's latest fling... but no one ever hears about who the inventor of staples went out to dinner with.

These are my reasons for why red, white, and blue are patriotic.

Red: Jesus always speaks in red. You never see him speak in purple. Of course, some "unholy" Bibles do have him speaking in black. But, we won't go there.

Blue: Smurfs are blue. 'Nough said.

White: Now this is a tough one... but, I am going to have to go with the fact that most cows have white on them. Since beef is what's for dinner... obviously cows are patriotic. Therefore, white is patriotic.

I am done for now... don't forget to vote!!!

Do I get a sticker if I use the word meritorious?

Hello All...


Today is my second day posting. I don't feel as special. Perhaps it is because last night I was really tired and anything made me excited, including randomly typing my disparaging and thoroughly non-entertaining thoughts on the internet for the whole world to see.

I went to church this morning. That was good. I got to check a book out of the library... really it was just an excuse to avoid reading Lord of the Rings. I know that I am an English major, and that as such I am supposed to enjoy reading books longer than 567 pages, but this book has been the bane of my existence all summer! I am sorry Tolkien and any of Mr. T.'s fans out there who may be reading this, but I would much prefer some soapy Christian romance or a historical mystery.

Today is Saturday. The day after JAG. Always the most depressing day of my life. Ah well... life will go on. It really is pathetic, though because I haven't even written fanfiction in a while. I seem to be stuck in mental neutral. I haven't been creative in quite a while. I am hoping that this blog will help me to unleash my potential creativity. Any science majors out there know if potential creativity has any connection to potential energy?

That is all for tonight folks... sorry it's been rather boring. Or perhaps I should say "folk"? I am pretty sure there is only one person that reads this. And that may be a hyperbole (ohh--ten points for the English vocab word!!!). That will definately impress the producers of JAG. In fact, just write my contract up right now. I will work for food. And clothes... I need clothes. Although... the rerun of JAG that was on last night showed Mac and Clay having an argument in bed with very minimal clothing. Perhaps it is just me, but women really are more effective when they argue WITH THEIR CLOTHES ON!!! Okay, one more comment about JAG and then I am done... do normal people use the word "meritorious" in their daily vocabulary? Or is it just random TV JAG lawyers. Just an observation. I think, ultimately, that the screenwriters really wanted to impress their high school English teachers. Now I am really done!